- A police officer
pulled this guy over for speeding and told him that his eyes were blood
shot, and asked him if he'd been drinking. The guy said "Your eyes are
glazed, have you been eating donuts?"
- Is that your face
or did your neck throw up?
- Last time I saw you,
you had lost some weights, looks like you found it.
- A sharp tongue is
no indication of a keen mind.
- As an outsider, what
do you think of the human race?
- Can I borrow your
face for a few days while my ass is on vacation?
- Do you have to leave
so soon? I was about to poison the tea.
- Do you want me to
accept you as you are or you want me to like you?
- Have you considered
suing your brains for non - support?
- How did you get there?
Did someone leave your cage open?
- I heard you changed
your mind! What did you do with the diaper?
- I know you are nobody's
fool but maybe someone will adopt you.
- I know you're not
stupid as you look. Nobody could be!
- I would have liked
to insult you, but with your intelligence you wouldn't get offended.
- I'd like to see things
from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my
ass.
- If I had a face like
yours, I'd sue my parents.
- I'll never forget
the first time we met - although I'll keep trying.
- I'm blonde, what's
your excuse?
- I'm busy now. Can
I ignore you some other time?
- Ordinary people live
and learne. You just live.
- Pardon me, but you've
obviously mistaken me for someone who give a damn.
- Some day you will
find yourself and wish you hadn't.
- They say opposites
attract. I hope you meet someone who is good - looking, intelligent, and
cultured.
- When God was throwing
intelligence down to the Earth, you were holding an umbrella!
- You are living proof
that manure can grow legs and walk.
- Looks like you face
was lit on fire and put out with an axe.
- Hey I got a joke that
will knock the tits off you... Oh, seems someone already told you!
- Hey, what position
makes an ugly baby? Ask your mom.
